On March 9, Hong Kong's Prestige magazine released the interview they had with Big Bang's T.O.P.

On this day, the Big Bang member shared various things, including the deep things that he had never shared before, such as how he felt when the marijuana controversy broke out and how he battles with his depression.

T.O.P (Choi Seung Hyun) has always been known to be a big art collector alongside fellow Big Bang member G-Dragon. Therefore, the Hong Kong magazine reached out to the signer for the Prestige’s annual Art Issue.

T.O.P met with the magazine via zoom and shared his honest feelings about his career and where he is planning to go. He first explained, "This is a time to leap to the next stage of my career and life." T.O.P confessed that he had a hard time when the marijuana incident broke out and spent the last five years writing songs. He explained that was the worst moment of his life, and that is the reason he had decided to disappear from the public's eye. T.O.P explained, "This is the first time I’ve spoken this publicly, but I did try to commit suicide about five years ago. I realized later how much hurt and painful memories I gave to the people around me, my family, and fans out there."

He continued to say, "Actually, I was going to seriously stop making music and stop being a musician. But during the bad times, the rough times, my motivation to keep going was the music. I wrote more than 100 songs over the past five years. It’s been my motivation, like wanting to fill up a bookshelf with my work. It’s been my passion. I realized how precious it is to pay back what I’ve received. I feel that I’m reborn."

T.O.P also confessed that he had been suffering from depression since he was young and shared how he has been fighting against it. He explained, "Since I was young I’ve suffered from depression, but by looking at beautiful things, especially art, I feel relaxed, I feel relieved. I was born to be sad. I’ve felt extra sensitive compared to other kids since I was young. I knew it and felt it, and spent more time and more effort to get over it by spending time with art."

Other than this, T.O.P shared his views on art and his thoughts as a musician. He explained that he wants to put hopes and dreams in his music for young people who are also suffering from depression.

You can read T.O.P's full interview on Prestige's official website.