Hello people who've stumbled on my first post on this site although at the time I upload this it is already April 9th, 2019 but my original intentions still stay the same a song dedicated for Kim Jonghyun, so a few things to know when reading my lyrics

-I prefer you to listen to it with Diphyellia Grayi if you simply can't then that's fine why? because its because Diphyellia Grayi matches the tone set for the song

-Why is it called Stuck in 4... and some story behind, I my idea was to create a song Shawols and even people with lovers or whatever relationship you have can relate to in some way as you may see below and as well add my personal relationship on my feelings with Jonghyun and this is how I cope with it so it's short answer it's called Stuck in 4, because I'm still stuck in 4 stages of grief although there is usually 7...

-Also could be a bit long, so read when you've got time + keep Diphyellia on repeat?

Now read away~

Did I hear correctly?

Years suddenly vanished like the air out of my lungs

They tell me you're gone that it won?

You can't be gone can you?

Not a person who was just living

How could you leave so sudden?

Cover my ears don't fill my head with lies

The only feeling is feeling my mind flooded with whys?

Snap out of it don't cry he didn't leave me

Look at the screen, smile and let that laugh escape

it'll do anything to hide the pain you feel deep in you

it simply isn't true you never drew that last breath like they proclaimed, did you? 

don't push that it was true when I need you, I needed you

I needed you,

I needed you

I simply needed you,

needed you, baby, I needed you

And you needed me too

You said please I need you too.

I love to believe that there wasn't a deep rip in you

Outside you boasted someone new

You knew how much I needed you and you were there

I said it would strain you but you stayed true

You loved being there for me but what about you?

When you pleaded for me now I'm hearing news of you through a TV screen?

Scream only my pitiful screams where did it all go wrong?

Where did I go wrong with you?

Where did you go?

Ask myself the same thing all of this is wrong simply wrong

Me being with you and you being with me it was wrong

Was it for the good?

At least you left for the better

But leaving without a care I don't understand didn't you care?

Leaving me here all alone to be miserable with myself only holding on to you that isn't you

Why go so soon?

Didn't we have something between us two?

How about me instead of you?

But you didn't like me hurting myself, didn't you?

Thinking deeper sink more, think more with that time passed like playing with an hourglass 

It quickly thinned and thinned until the last slip of grain and innated into its rest then that had fallen- quickly settled

Tried to flip it proves nothing no it doesn't work like that accept the fact that you can't bring him back.

Back why won't you return to me?

Please grace me with your light once again

Hold onto the memories who knows if I could lose them, afraid for you

How I hold you so preciously losing you would mean losing me too

Looking up never understanding asking why

Why to the sky I knew the world heard me say it so many times but I never wanted them to listen I said it to you

Never hearing back did you forget me?

Did you not hear me loud enough?

I said I was ready to feel what you felt and you gave it to me

You answered using that by sharing the pain

Sharing it hurt us both until it was nothing, nothing absolutely nothing

Then numbing what hasn't been touched before

Furthermore, you exposed me to a former self

Do I thank you or do I plead?

Continue to let this emptiness surround me?

Should I drown in my own misery?

But you didn’t allow me

You stuck out your hand to me and held me

Told me you did well no amazingly and I said the same

You said forgive me no you were long forgiven

You said you and I did well just stay with me

Whispered I'll hold you breathe and stay with me it's okay breathe and you'll stay with me under the light of our blue Moon oh baby

 수고했어 I've never heard someone say a word so meaningly

The blue moon is where we’ll be free as long as you're with me...

Thank you~

And thank you Jonghyun + SHINee <3

@RainyJisung for my Insta if you wanna follow~